April 2008
Dear Bradley,
I am in touch with a woman online I like very much. We've been emailing each other constantly for about a month. She likes me only as a good friend. What can I say or do to get her to like me as much as I like her? Thanks!
John in Freehold, NJ
Dear John,
Is there a worse invention than email? Okay, maybe the pet rock is worse, but I'm telling you that email is a close second. You used to be able to call a girl you were dating just once a day for five minutes, and then you were done with it. Now, girls expect you to email them several times a day at a minimum and throw in a few text messages for good measure. And the emails can't just be your average, everyday "how are you?" emails. No, no, no, no, no! Instead, girls insist that your emails be clever, interesting, funny and include little anecdotes that take you hours to compose.
Memo to girls: We have better things to do with our time than to write you emails all day!! Come on, there's always something good on TV, or some trades to complete with our fantasy teams. We just don't have time to fit email into our busy schedules.
John, it is time for you to stop playing email games with this girl and take this relationship to the next level. And by next level, I mean it's time to get this girl on the phone. Once she starts talking to you, she will realize you are more than just her cute, little email buddy. You have needs, too. Perhaps you can broker a deal: she can have her daily emails if, and only if, she agrees to go out with you. In other words, she can keep getting her emails, but it's going to cost her. Tell her something like "I really enjoy emailing with you, but it's hard for me to email with someone I don't really know in person. I bet I could write twice as good emails if I only knew you better. How about we grab dinner or a drink sometime?" I bet she will say yes. Unless, of course, she is some wild eyed, wooden-legged, 300-pound, hunchbacked woman...in which case you probably don't want to be emailing with her anyway.
Your pal,
Bradley
3 Comments:
I hate email too! But i luuuuv girls!!
yeah yeah
ok, what you are saying is you have time for the phone but not an email? talk to this woman on the phone, then suggest meeting with her becase your' interested in getting to know her personally. this will set off fewer bells and whistles in a girl's mind. then get to know each other. P.S-the time you meet would also be a good time to find out if she's in a previous relationship:)
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