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Dear Bradley,

I found a girl but can't get her to open up. She hates the boy scouts of which I'm a member. She's also very important to me so I can't drive her away. She's pretty smart, too, so flattery doesn't work. She's also really hot so nothing you say about her body is an overstatement. How do I make her mine?

Thank you for your help.

Big Ben in Greeneville, TN

Dear Big Ben,

The boy scouts are great for a lot of things. If you want to learn how to tie four different types of knots in less than 30 seconds, the boy scouts are your group. If you want to learn how to save a wounded squirrel, the boy scouts are your team. If you want to start a fire with nothing but a twig and your bare hands, then you can do no better than the boy scouts. But if you want to date a hot girl, you're in the wrong place. By now you are probably figuring out that this hot girl you like doesn't get nearly as excited about the scissors option on your Swiss army knife as your fellow troop members. Seriously though, can you blame her?

You need to show off your boy scout skills without ever mentioning anything about the group or saying the word "boy scout". For instance, ask her to accompany you on a nice outdoor activity like a hike or fishing outing. While on the excursion, you can impress her by talking about the nature around you. "That's a blue bird mating call... You can tell that a bear was here because of the claw marks on the tree..." Hot girls will only open up after you have convinced them that you are not after them for their looks. (Of course, we are only after them for their looks so this presents a tricky scenario). Some harmless activities will wear this girl down and let her know that you are a guy worth dating.

Your pal,

Bradley

7 Comments:

Anonymous said...: i luv a guy in uniform...; 4:28 PM
max said...: -bradley,
i have a delema. i really like these 2 girls, one i can talk to, the other is seriously HOT! what should i do?; 10:22 AM
Anonymous said...: That girl is dumb man! BSA RULZ!!!!!
She should go to the Girl Scouts. The
BSA take you everywhere! They just took me to see the Harlem Globetrotters!!! So tell that Girl that the BSA rocks and she should stop hating them!!!!; 2:22 PM
Anonymous said...: Bradley, you made a serious mistake. You should first make clear whether Big Ben wants her to open up, or OPEN UP... to understand the full depth of the problem.

(Yeah I'm a pig... kill me.); 11:33 AM
Anonymous said...: Dear Bradly,
girls rule and we know what guys like. So i suggest that you stop giving these dumb advices,
they are never going to work!!
And to the boys,
stop listening to Bradley i bet that he can't get even one girl!!; 7:42 AM
Anonymous said...: there is nothing wrong with girl scouts. i assure you we go everywhere that boy scouts do. and not all girls are interested in nature. some would rather stay at home. to the young man: tell this girl you like her personally(and not in front of her friends) there's nothing any human being likes more than learning that someone likes them. if she rejects you, forget about her. there are other fish in the sea. maybe some ather girl likes you;); 6:20 PM
coral said...: its not fair boy scouts get their own freakin' BILLBOARD for crying out loud!; 7:25 PM

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